Someone is not likely to open up and reveal their deep emotional pain to someone acting harsh, accusatory, lacking empathy, compassion and understanding.

     People also need to communicate and have open conversations about sensitive subjects so that the wounded will know that it is okay to share their pain without someone judging them or betraying them. If one simply covers an infected wound without cleaning it, the infection is likely to get worse; the same occurs with emotional wounds. –

     In the same way that someone who has physical injuries needs to be handled with gentleness, those with inner wounds ‘need’ gentleness to heal. One could further injure a person with emotional wounds simply with being harsh with them or proceeding without tenderness. In cases with trauma wounds, gentleness is not only a ‘desire’ but rather a ‘need’.

     People often act defensive because they are wounded within and something that someone has said or done has touched on these wounds whether they intended to cause harm or not.

     Sometimes finding ways to reword things or using a softer tone can make all of the difference. Harsh statements such as, ‘you just need to get over it’, or, ‘others have been through worse,’ can cause immense hurt and further wounding.

     A common phrase often used by children, ‘sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never harm me’ is an attempt to show that words will not affect a person. Yet, gang wars have been started by a simple phrase; people have been triggered by words spoken about a family member, friend or child and lashed out physically and many other examples could be presented to prove that words (and the tone of voice used) can cause great damage.

     Someone who has been physically wounded could be harmed more easily than a healthy person could due to the weakened state (such as in the case of someone having broken ribs and someone giving them a tight hug), likewise, those who have been damaged spiritually and emotionally are more sensitive to hurtful words or actions (and at times even those words or actions that wouldn’t harm a person without those emotional wounds).

     The words and actions that can hurt one person may not hurt another based on the condition of the person’s emotional and spiritual position. If one has accidentally wounded another then the greatest gift one has available to them is to apologize and make things right.

     Sometimes the greatest healing can occur when one applies some gentleness to the wounded heart and soul. The most wonderful part of healing is that amazing healing can occur through genuine, kind and gentle words just as harmful words cause harm. Compassionate and tender actions can also help bring healing from aggressive and hurtful actions.

     Using harsh and rash words and actions towards someone who has encountered trauma to ‘try to bring about change’ is like pulling hard at a knot or something that is tangled. The more that one pulls at the knot (or tangle) the tighter and harder it gets to undo. If someone uses gentleness and ‘a soft hand’ the quicker and easier it will be to undo.

     …’ Pleasant words are like a honeycomb, sweet and delightful to the soul and healing to the body’… Proverbs 16:24 AMP (The Amplified Translation)

     …’A soft and gentle and thoughtful answers turns away wrath, but harsh and painful and careless words stir up anger’… Proverbs 15:1 AMP (The Amplified Translation)